How to survive the Furious Fours (kinda)

It’s been a truly horrible morning. Who knew that buttoning a cardigan could cause so much anger, frustration and distress? But it can when there’s a four-and-a-half-year-old involved. At least when it’s my four-and-a-half-year-old. My daughter is going through what I’m optimistically referring to as a ‘phase’. We’ve had the Terrible Twos and The Threenagers.…

A mother’s CV

Mummy Curriculum vitae PERSONAL STATEMENT Dedicated, hard-working and supremely adaptable individual seeks more credit for doing a bloody hard job seven days a week. RELEVANT EXPERIENCE Leadership: skilled in growing, educating, nurturing, managing and caring for two small human beings. Able to make tough decisions: knowing when to abort much-looked-forward-to day out in favour of…

I’m crap at multitasking and so are you

Women are crap at multitasking. Whatever you think you know about the superiority of the female race and our innate ability to perform more than one task at once is, quite frankly, a debilitating myth. Don’t get me wrong, men are utterly crap at multitasking too. All human beings are.* But it’s us women who…

Motherhood: Five things I now can’t do and five random things I now can do

Five things I can no longer do since becoming a mother 1) Enjoy a long, carefree, morning shower (fat chance) 2) Wallow (there’s too much sh*t to do) 3) Get anyway near enough sleep (it's going to take decades to recover from this one) 4) Nurse a hangover (there’s no mercy in this house) 5) Watch…